No one ever told me that for a good chunk of my life, being miserable would be so easy and that I would have to work to be happy. Remember being a kid and just being happy, save for a few skinned knees and groundings? Happy was easy.
Then what happened? I don't know, life and understanding I suppose. The more you know, the more you start to realize all the shit life will hand you to make you miserable. There's so much to be sad about, you can make yourself crazy thinking about it. Being happy takes work. You really do have to focus on the positives, try to see the good in everyone, and really learn what makes you happy.
The good part is, the more you do this, the easier it gets. So that's good.
No one ever told me I would so often find myself in moral dilemmas. We're taught the basics of right and wrong and that's sort of the end of it. Do this, don't do that, follow along. So, I've puttered through life with an idea of right and wrong, and then I have blatantly decided to do things that I know are wrong because, hey, maybe it just feels right. Or maybe I don't care about the consequences. Maybe I don't think there will be any. I don't think knowing right or wrong really helps you when temptation is staring you in the face. If that were the case I would have consumed a lot less cake in my life and I'd have way more money.
No one ever told me that THIS is in fact IT. And by this, I guess I mean adulthood and normalcy. We're taught to dream big, but not practical. Life is rent, food, shelter, work and responsibility. I have shelved my dreams of becoming a rock star only recently. I'm not going to be anything particularly special. I'm not going to be famous or infamous. I'm just going to be me and THANK GOODNESS I am ok with that. I like my life.
No one ever told me there would be days where I just didn't want to do it anymore. It being anything. There are days I don't feel like doing anything at all. There are days I wish I could just sleep straight through... you know, I don't feel like dealing with Wednesday today... zzzzzzz.... I didn't see that coming. Those days scare the piss out of me.
No one ever told me that there would be some situations in life where I would learn more and understand less. In no particular order; global finance, the Palestinian/Israeli conflict, notions of romance, why I keep eating sugar when I know it's poison, tennis scoring, and blackjack.
No one ever told me I would learn so much from just paying attention to the world around me. I have a big mouth but even I can shut it once and awhile and just observe. And let me tell you, I don't like what I see one bit. We're in trouble. People are just the worst.
No one ever told me I would come to like animals more than people, but I think this is perfectly ok. I'd rather go for a walk with a dog than another person any day, and keep in mind the human won't poop on the grass, leaving me to clean it up. Dogs are awesome.
No one ever told me I'd be ok, but here I am. Sometimes things just come together. Go with it.
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